Some polar bear, probably not Knut, attacked a woman at the Berlin Zoo. She probably wanted a hug, so she climbed into the cage. Most people don’t understand that polar bears are highly territorial and need to be consulted before an encounter. Too bad for her, but not too bad.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/04/11/polar.bear.attack/index.html
Recently, a new species of bear was discovered. It’s called the Water Bear, and they only grow to about 1 mm long. Water Bears are extremely aggressive, like most bears, but the cool thing is how resiliant they are. Water Bears can survive ANYTHING. They are the only animal to be exposed to the harsh conditions of outerspace and survive. I’m not kidding: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/09/080908135906.htm.
Here’s a video of a Water Bear in action.
Today, my wife and I were in a local pet store looking for inspirational reading and weight loss supplements for our chubby cat, Skittles, when I came across a cage labeled “Honey bears”. You can imagine my surprise; they have been selling juvenile Honeybears along side regular hamsters and mice! I don’t know what sicko from Delaware would be supplying major pet stores WITH BEARS but bringing him/her to justice is another story. Naturally, I recognized the threat and purchased the two bears immediately.
Before I continue, I think a little background is necessary. As you’ve read in the Honeybear article, these creatures are pretty damn muscular. The speed with which they need to run to catch the necessary amount of prey to keep them running that speed requires a body fat percentage of only 2%. Furthermore, the average Honeybear weighs roughly 300-320 kg, of which nearly 270 kg is muscle. The point is, these bears don’t have much room for auxiliary tissue, such as reproductive organs. So, Honeybear cubs are extremely small when born due to the limited space the mother Honeybear has inside her belly. Below is a picture of newborn Honeybears.
I suppose I can understand how someone would think this creature is “cute” or a “hamster of some sort”. Maybe they think their disposition is sweet because they’re called “Honeybears”. Well, they aren’t sweet; they’re BEARS. And the only reason they’re called honey is because that’s the standard color of their fur, though it can range from a ruddy brown to pale fawn.
So we bought the two Honeybear cubs and a secure enclosure manufactured by CritterTrails (trust me, I banged on the plastic for while and it hardly broke). We returned home with our deadly find and set them up in their new home. Fortunately, time is on our side. Because Honeybears require so much muscle, they grow very slowly–quality over quantity. Below is a picture of our Siamese cat, Muffin, keeping an eye on the bears.
And here’s a picture of the bears together. They’re huddled with each other because they don’t have enough body fat to stay warm if they aren’t running.
So far I’ve observed the two fighting, hoarding, running and sleeping. They can climb much better than I was expecting and I will report this finding to the National Association of Bear Research (NABR). Below is a picture of one specimen scaling a vertical tube from the inside. Imagine if this bear were full grown and climbing up your chimney.
So, here’s the thing. Next time you go to the pet store looking for a new pet, stick with mice, hamsters, snakes, hedgehogs and gerbils. If you see a cage labeled, “Honeybear” or “Honey Bear”, stay away. Even if the label reads, “Honey Bear Hamster”, it is a mistake. These are not hamsters; they are juvenile bears. Honeybears are 50 times more vicious than grizzly bears and bear adoption is a binding contract in 49 states whether the adopter is aware that the adoptee is a bear or not. Unless you are a trained, certified professional, adopting a Honeybear is certain death for you and your family. You have been warned. If you see any Honeybears available for sale ANYWHERE, send me an email at tom at bearscare dot org so that I can remove the threat and re-home the bears in the bear facility my wife and I operate from our house. Thank you.
Did you know that there’s a bearscare.info? It’s written in a language I can’t understand (French, Greek, Korean, etc.) but I did gather from peeping it that the bearscare is a walking stick on which one end can be ignited to scare a bear. Here’s a diagram from the website:
This really isn’t going to work. Bears aren’t stupid. They know that humans CAN’T hurt them. Really the best defense you have you must encounter a bear is kind words, a hug and offerings of food, drink and (in W. VA, Maryland, Tennessee and Mississippi) cigarettes.
Whatever, guys.
Just kidding. This site is about animals (bears) and that’s it. Here’s a koala.
I’m sorry, Knut. I’m sorry they make it this difficult for you.
Sorry I didn’t post this on New Year’s Day as promised. There were many more submissions than I was expecting and choosing wasn’t easy. This year’s winner is:
The prize is that Heidi’s submission below will be released in a limited edition signed and numbered by me. The price is $0. Please contact tom at bearcare dot org for purchasing details.
The winning submission below is not available for purchase through this site and it is highly unlikely it will ever be available through any site. Those interested in the image should contact Heidi. Thanks to everyone who participated and thanks to Heidi for her great art! Keep up the good work!
According to the Daily Mail, some guy leapt into Knut’s enclosure because he was lonely and felt the 2-year-old bear was too. Zookeepers lured Knut away from his new dinner and into a cage before removing the man from the enclosure. Police said he did not appear to be mentally disabled. Although I certainly share this man’s desire to befriend Knut, I do realize, as a bear expert and enthusiast, that making a bear friend is a slow process which requires lots of patience and trust. I know that after months of bringing seal meat and making bear noises Knut would come to accept me. I would never, however, try to rush him into a friendship that makes him uncomfortable or hungry.
In case you haven’t heard already, Knut, the AWESOME polar bear cub who captured our hearts and minds a year or so ago (pictured below), is BEING SOLD. I intend to buy him.
Look, here’s the thing. I love that bear. I never got to Germany to visit him and I can’t imagine going to some other loser country where he might wind up. My plan is to keep him in the middle bedroom of our apartment. There’s a red sofa in there that he can sleep on and a book case and I could even clear our stuff out of the closet. There’s only one problem: polar bears are expensive. BUT I’m taking donations. Please leave the amount you’re pledging along with contact information as a comment and I will get back to you. This is urgent. I expect I’ll need $100,000+ USD. Contributors will have some visitation privileges.
Check it out. One of my readers maintains a fan-page for the Seekers series of books. As it turns out, these books (by Erin Hunter) are written from the point of view of bears (all different types). Here is a review of the first book in the series, The Quest Begins, from amazon.com:
Erin Hunter did a great job on Warriors and is did an amazing job on Seekers, so if you like animal adventures then Seekers is the book for you. This fantasy talks about three bears: Kalik a polar bear, Susa a black bear, and Tolko a brown bear. Kalik has the harder life, when Susa instead is on a mission to meet Tolko, and Tolko wants to be scary. In the mean time the bears learn what a no-claws is. Will Susa make it to Tolko in time before the no-claws come??? Will Kalik be able to take responsibility with no mom, no friends, but just herself??? The life of these three bears is going to change in a way that you can not imagine. Read the book to find out.
Below are my comments.
Erin Hunter did a great job on Warriors and is did an amazing job on Seekers, so if you like animal adventures then Seekers is the book for you.
My entire life is an animal adventure.
This fantasy talks about three bears: Kalik a polar bear, Susa a black bear, and Tolko a brown bear.
3/8 bear species in one book? I am about to LOSE IT (pass out).
Kalik has the harder life, when Susa instead is on a mission to meet Tolko, and Tolko wants to be scary. In the mean time the bears learn what a no-claws is.
A no-claws is a friendly animal that might make good food but shouldn’t be eaten. Ferocious bears, like some vampires, need to learn to control their feeding instincts.
Will Susa make it to Tolko in time before the no-claws come??? Will Kalik be able to take responsibility with no mom, no friends, but just herself??? The life of these three bears is going to change in a way that you can not imagine. Read the book to find out.
Kalik does need to learn to deal with her situation. It sucks being a lonely polar bear, but she just needs to relax and be herself. She’ll find friends when the time is right but she shouldn’t rush it; she wouldn’t want to fall in with the wrong crowd.
Another review I found very insightful is this one:
Erin Hunter is one of the most amazing writers of the 21st cencury (exuse my spelling) and i would read any book by her if i were you.
I particularly have enjoyed my reader’s fan-site. It is broken down into many logical sections, one being Seekers fan graphics. Below is my favorite one:
I do plan to buy this book and will write a complete review here. If anybody else has read this, please leave a comment. Of course I knew there were current novels about bears, but I didn’t know about this one. Bye!
